As few may know, I have recently been diagnosed with a disease. This disease has been tentatively titled Jennings’ Syndrome after Hannah Jennings became the first recorded case in 1843.
The symptoms are: sloppiness, childishness, impracticality, selfishness, regular underperformance in jobs and responsibilities, and occasional bouts of being an arrogant bitch.
Unfortunately there is no known cure. Doctors, however, recommend that those individuals close to Jennings’ Syndrome patients regularly reprimand them, as to keep in their constant awareness the reality of their condition. With repeated action, we hope that this practice will bring into play the well-studied tenant of psychology that emotional punishment is the foundation for growth and flourishing.